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Why would someone with such a perfect reality ever deserve a fantasy, too? The man cave exists as a kind of salvation for suburban dads who resent their families for interfering with their fantasy football drafts. These men are not capable of being delicate. They are the male ethos writ large: no ambitions beyond hiding in a place surrounded by miniscule triumphs and pedestrian hobbies, while females are present only in two dimensions on a television screen with the volume turned down low. Their vision of paradise is microwavable appetisers, a beanbag chair with Dale Earnhardt stitched onto it, watching that Kate Upton.

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Arielle. Age: 28.
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Is this really who men are?

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Penelope. Age: 32.
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Land of the Free, Home of the Cave

We are not men , but almost. If we are, we wear it as a disguise. The men depicted in beer commercials exist, scurrying from women like boarding school students around a schoolmarm.

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